Freedom is Never Free

I often used the phrase “nothing in life is free” when trying to teach my children to look beyond the word “free” so often used in advertising.  This includes freedom, which has the highest cost of anything we could wish for or want.

Our forefathers knew the price when they set out to fight for independence for themselves and their children from the tyranny of British rule.  The price was only their lives, which they were prepared to pay on the battlefield or on the gallows for treason if they lost.  Yet, they signed up to pay it.

Today, our freedom has the same price and we must be prepared to pay it because, one way or another, we will pay.

With a world full of extremists wishing to kill Americans all over the world we have thousands of our troops prepared to pay that price on our behalf while thousands of Americans fail to see how our troop’s service contributes to our freedom.  In fact, even when the fight comes to our front door, many still fail to see the cost of freedom.

The most recent example is the full body scan or pat down at our nation’s airports.

The question is; do these scans or searches violate our 4^th Amendment rights?  It reads; “The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.”

In an ideal world I would say that the scan or pat down do violate these rights, but we live in a world where people carry explosives hidden on their body onto airplanes, busses, and into crowded markets and public places with the intent to kill or maim innocent people every day.  That’s hardly an ideal world.

So, what are we prepared to pay for our freedom to travel?  We can pay by submitting to the scan/pat down or we can pay by risking our lives.

Since I don’t have to travel much it would be easy for me to say that the scan/pat down is an acceptable price for our safety.  However, putting myself in place of those who do travel often, I have to agree that they sound invasive and demeaning.  I suppose if we had a squad of Adonis look-a-likes to frisk the women and a squad of Aphrodite look-a-likes to frisk the men it might be different, but even this wouldn’t make everyone happy.  So, is there an alternative?

I don’t believe that these precautions eliminate the risk altogether because time and again when we’ve built a better mouse trap the enemy has built a better mouse.  So, having faith in God (I’m not religious by any stretch of the imagination, but I am faithful) and in our fellow man is the only alternative I can think of that would allow us to eliminate the scan or pat down.

What I mean by “faith in our fellow man” is that we must all become vigilant (not vigilantes) and observant to the threats around us.  We must be prepared to take the appropriate action when we observe a threat.  This action would most often be notifying the authorities (remember I said no vigilantes), but could entail physical action when there’s no other alternative.  The terrorists insist on treating us like combatants, so we must be prepared to act like combatants.

If we allow the scan or pat down to continue, our enemies have already won by getting us to give up our right against “unreasonable searches” to protect us from their threat.

So what price are you willing to pay for your freedom?

If we want semi risk free flying, we must pay by accepting the scan or pat down or we must be willing to pay by defending our rights, even if that means dying or killing for them.  I am willing to act like a combatant if the terrorists are going to treat me like one.  I don’t want to die or kill for my rights, but if forced to do so, I believe I will.

Patrick Henry said to the Virginia Convention on March 23, 1775, at St. John's Church in Richmond, Virginia; “...The battle, sir, is not to the strong alone; it is to the vigilant, the active, the brave. Besides, sir, we have no election. If we were base enough to desire it, it is now too late to retire from the contest. There is no retreat but in submission and slavery! Our chains are forged! ... Our brethren are already in the field!  Why stand we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!”

The choice is ours.

The Right Choice

So when did people start thinking that the solution to their problems is to make it someone else’s problem?

On a recent and rare rainy day in So Cal, I got up at my usual 6:00AM, checked my e-mail, and prepared to go out for my cup of Starbucks coffee and bagel.  I went right to the closet where I put my umbrella at the end of the previous rainy season, threw it in my truck, got my coffee and bagel, and returned home to get into my workday.

Around lunch time, I decided to run to the market.  When I got to my truck, my umbrella was missing.  Certain my son had taken it out of my truck on his way to school because he didn’t know where his was, I sent him a text to confirm.

Of course, I was right.  I got really mad when he insisted that it must have been his umbrella because he couldn’t find his where he’d last seen it.  I went off and I read him the riot act over the phone.  My umbrella was right where I’d put it the year before, right next to my raincoat.  However, now I, who took the time to store my umbrella, was inconvenienced because he’d seen it fit to make his problem (not knowing where his umbrella is) my problem.

And it’s not that I’m afraid to get wet.  Had he asked me if he could take it because he couldn’t find his, I would have let him and thrown on a baseball cap.

Well, he got the message.  However, what about the millions of people who don’t have the benefit of my tutelage?  How will they learn that lesson?

Several days later, when I took my family for coffee and breakfast, he got to see how it feels to have someone solve their problem by making it our problem.

My favorite Starbucks is on a small corner lot.  Neither of the two driveways allows left turns.  The main driveway comes out to a six lane highway, with 2 left turn lanes, a right turn lane, and is about 40 feet from an intersection.  The cross street leads up into the hills to a landfill, so the left turn lanes are always full of trucks.

As I pulled out of my parking space, I noticed the light was green for the traffic I was about merge into.  I slowed to allow a woman coming out of the drive-thru to pull out in front of me.  As she reached the driveway, she stopped even though there was not traffic preventing her from turning right.  It was then I realized with dismay that she intended to drive across 4 lanes of traffic to get into the left turn lane which was at the moment occupied by two semis.  By this time, the light had turned red and traffic started to pile up at the intersection.  We waited.

Another car pulled up behind me.  The left turn arrow turned green and the semis went.  The street light changed to green again, but by the time the traffic blocking her moved, two more semis had once again filled the left turn lanes, and again, we waited.  Finally, she made a left turn into on-coming traffic and a hard right turn to get behind the semis in the left turn lane.  By this time I was looking forward to catching the third green light I would see at that intersection.

Had she turned right on the first green light, she could have driven a quarter of a block, made a legal U-turn, and a right turn onto the cross street.  ALL BEFORE THE FIRST SEMI COMPLETED HIS TURN, AND WITHOUT MAKING HER PROBLEM, MY PROBLEM!

This morning I left my house for my usual coffee and bagel run.  As I reached the right turn that leads through the gates of our community I notice a woman in an SUV coming through the gate and another woman in a Suburban coming from the direction opposite me turn as if to exit.  Instead of exiting however, she motions to the woman coming in and they both stopped right between the entrance and exit gates to chat.  I thought it was rude, inconsiderate, and inappropriate, but there was enough room so I turned right and I continued on my way.

THIRTY MINUTES LATER, I came back through the gate to find these same two inconsiderate women still chatting in the middle of the intersection.  This time they’re blocking my left turn, so the one in the Suburban motions for me to go around.

I couldn’t contain myself, so I rolled down the window and in as jovial a manner as I could muster I told them I thought it was inconsiderate for them to hold their conversation right there.  The woman in the Suburban said they were friends and hadn’t seen each other in a while.

Well, at least I should find comfort in knowing she wasn’t blocking the road chatting with some random stranger.  I mean, come on!  They’re neighbors for heaven sakes.  They couldn’t call each other?  The woman in front of me finally decided she should move, and so I came home to write this.

I’m sure I’m not the only one that has been stuck in the left lane of a road behind some car close to an intersection with a green light in your favor because they discovered too late that they needed to turn on that street, so they decide to wait until they can merge into the turn lane blocking all traffic behind them.  In order to solve their problem caused by their inattention they feel its okay for them to stop traffic because no one behind them could possibly mind.

And how about the person in the lane next to you who suddenly veers into your lane to avoid a car that stopped in from of them instead of stopping themselves, causing you to slam on your brakes?  They could have solved their problem by stopping; instead they make a sudden and unsafe lane change and turn their solution into your problem.

I could go on and on recalling other inconsiderate acts committed by people in an attempt to solve their problem only to make it someone else’s problem, but I think you get the point.

Now, I don’t want to sound like I think I’m some sort of saint who does no wrong.  However, I was always taught to have consideration for those around me.  I was always taught that my actions do affect others, so I was always taught to make good choices.

We’ve all found ourselves in situations where we missed a turn or an off ramp, but most of us would direct our anger inward and make the next turn, make a u-turn, or take the next off ramp.  Most of us would go out of our way to make it look like we didn’t make a mistake at all, like we meant to turn on the next street or take the next off ramp.  And most of us wouldn’t make a second bad choice that will affect someone else.

So what makes people do these things?  Do that many people really think their actions don’t affect others?  Or do they just not care about anyone else but themselves?  Am I being overly sensitive?

I think it has to do with our society’s growing sense of entitlement.  Too many people feel they are entitled to do anything to get their needs met without regard for others.  I bet these are the same people that flip you the bird if you were to do something like that and affected them.

We all make mistakes.  However, the fact that we make one doesn’t give us the right to make our mistake affect anyone else.  We simply need to ask ourselves how we’d feel if someone else made the same choice and it had an impact on us.

We always have choices in life.  Let’s start practicing making the right choice, and let us remember that our actions affect others.  The right choice should not have a negative impact on anyone else and should go unnoticed.

Charity Begins at Home!

The origins of this phrase have been attributed to a 17^th century British author, a Jewish philanthropist, and the Bible among others.

Most interpretations of the phrase suggest that we need to take care of our own before we ask, or can expect, others to take care of them.  In other words, don’t ask others to take on the burden of our aging parents or disabled relatives before you’ve exhausted all of your own personal resources doing so.

Other interpretations suggest that we must focus our efforts on our own home, family, city, state, or country before we expend any effort helping others outside of those groups.  Yet, I am constantly astounded at how quickly people I know apply this interpretation to their favorite college or professional sports team while ignoring their own family’s needs.

Coming from a large Cuban family, I can tell you that EVERYTHING begins at home.  What we learn as children is not about charity, it’s about life.

When you think about it, if it weren’t for our parents (or those in our home), we’d still be wearing diapers, drinking from a bottle, drooling, and babbling like children.  Actually, we wouldn’t be alive at all.

From the very beginning of our lives, it is those people in our home that taught us all the things we need to know to carry on in life.  They taught us how to use the bathroom, feed ourselves, use a napkin, and speak our language.  They took care of us and taught us how to care for ourselves.

They taught us the values by which we live.  They taught us how to behave.  They taught us about honesty, loyalty, friendliness, courage, courtesy, kindness, obedience, cleanliness, reverence, and a host of other principles that guide our actions and our lives.  And, yes, they taught us about charity.

We often hear about how awful our education system is, and while it is in a serious state of disrepair, we can only blame others for a portion of the problem.  A major part of the blame for that, and many other things, has to be placed in the home.

As the son of a teacher, mediocrity was not an option.  If I did poorly in school, my parents never blamed the teacher, they punished me!  It’s not that my parents expected all teachers to be perfect; they expected me to do my part.  They knew they taught me enough of the basics to be able to apply my own intelligence to make the learning process work.

As a result of this training at home, I was always the student most likely to challenge a teacher on any subject, including other languages.  I once challenged my Wood Shop teacher (a Mexican) that “chango” was Mexican slang for monkey, and “mono” was the appropriate Spanish word.  I won that argument by simply directing him to a Spanish dictionary.

If parents today do not take care of that learning process at home, how can we expect teachers to do so?  We can’t!

It doesn’t take a village to raise a child.  It takes loving and caring parents.  It takes parents, who are ready to teach their children values.  It takes parents, who are ready to take responsibility for their children and their actions.  It takes parents, who are ready to tell their children that a teacher is not stupid, but they are if they can’t learn from a teacher’s stupidity.

This is why my children were taught to count at a young age (in multiple languages).  This is why my children learned the ABCs at a young age.  This is why my 2-year-old granddaughter can count in English, Spanish, Japanese, and French.  This is why I encourage my son and daughter-in-law (not that they needed the encouragement) to read to and teach my granddaughter.  This is why I know my children and their children will succeed.

I’m often heard saying that there is no such thing as a bad child, only bad parents.  This is because I believe that parents have the ultimate responsibility to raise their children to be intelligent and productive adults.

Charity is not the only thing that begins at home.  EVRYTHING begins a home!

An Apple a Day...

After four months of laziness and inactivity that I kept justifying as necessary for my recovery from my hamstring injury, I put my foot down and got back to the gym.

All the way there I was searching through my mind for any excuse I could use to talk myself out of it.  Alas, nothing came to mind and I found myself walking through the gym doors.

I headed straight upstairs for the treadmills.  I stepped on two that appeared to be out of order, and I almost seized on that as my excuse to go home.  However, as luck would have it, the third one I tried worked.  I hopped on and began my cardio warm-up walking at 3 miles per hour on a 15% incline.

The chosen treadmill was up in the corner against the railing so I had an unobstructed view of the spectacle unfolding below.  A myriad of attractive young women in short shorts and tight tops showing off their perfectly sculpted figures while milling about not breaking a sweat, but instead doing their best to attract the attention of any number of Hercules wannabe’s as the later went about demonstrating amazing feats of strength.

I spent the first 5 minutes on the treadmill observing and thinking about how much stamina, strength, and endurance I’d lost in four months of inactivity.  I started wondering whether I was going to survive the workout.  Ten minutes into it, I had already convinced myself it was going to be a short 15 minute warm-up and a quick run through the weights.

That’s when I saw her.  Right across from me walking up the stairs was a woman about 5 years younger than me, about 6 inches shorter, who outweighed me by 40 or 50 pounds.  She appeared to be working on her cardio warm-up which consisted of nothing more than laboriously walking up and down the stairs painfully slow and with frequent stops.

I was immediately embarrassed at what a baby I was being.  Here I am, in relatively good shape, working harder at looking for excuses for not working out than actually working out.  All the while, across from me, was a woman who struggled for breath with each step, doing what she needed to do with a courage and determination that I seemed to lack.  Then, as if to underscore my shame, she limped to the front desk and met her personal trainer for a strength training session.  With a smile on her face, she followed the trainer to one of the machines and began working out.

How pathetic are we who look for and find these excuses?  I got angry at myself for having been such a wimp about my workout.

I stopped looking for excuses and drew on the woman’s courage to turn my warm-up into a 30 minute stint on the treadmill.  I then headed downstairs and set out to work my upper body with more intensity than normal.  I worked on all the same machines I normally use, but I increased the weight, added a third set instead of my normal two, and did each set until I couldn’t do the weight anymore.

As I was nearing the end of my strength training I noticed the woman finish her strength workout and proceed upstairs to the very treadmill I was on earlier and continue her workout.

I don’t know if I will ever see her at the gym again, but I can assure you I will think of her often.  That woman who struggled to breathe with each movement, with the courage of a price fighter, and the determination of a champion will forever be on my mind when I go to the gym.

That apple shaped woman will forever keep me focused on my workout.  I think the courage and determination I draw from her will be the apple I need to help keep my doctor away.

English as a Second Language

I know English is my second language, but is it everyone’s?

“Dude, check out my new ride.”, “That’s dope, dawg!”  (I think it means, “Hey, check out my new car.”, “It’s awesome, man!”)

“Dat bitch be bangin’, dawg.  I saw you choppin’ it up!”  (I think it means, “That girl is fine, man.  I saw you talking to her!”)

“Bitch, I got a new gig and imma be makin’ bank.”, “Shut up!”  (I think it means, “Girl, I got a new job and I’m going to get paid a lot.”, “Really?  That’s great!”)

Dude used to be someone that worked on a ranch.  Ride used to be something you did in your parent’s car. Dope was a not so bright person or marijuana (which made you act like a dope).  Dawg was what someone with a Southern drawl called a canine.  Bitch was either a female dog or a mean girl.  Bangin’ was something you did to your head on the desk when you failed a test.  Choppin’ it up was something you did to wood.  Gig used to be a two wheeled one horse carriage.  Bank used to be a place where you kept your money.  Dat was an abbreviation for “digital audiotape” and imma was never a word.

And when the hell did “Shut Up!” become synonymous with “Really?” or “Are you kidding?”?

Now, I realize that every generation’s youth has its own vocabulary.  I think it’s our way of showing our parents how un-hip they are compared to us.  I know in my generation we gave words like “bad”, “crazy”, “psychedelic”, and “groovy” meanings not found in the dictionary.  I know my generation also used phrases like “Outta sight!”, “Can you dig it?”, “Far out!”, and “Dream on!”  But we also read books, wrote essays in school, and learned the language.

But “Shut up!”?  That was an insult!  To have someone tell us to shut up was like saying that our thoughts had no value.  For some reason, this is the phrase that bothers me most.

Every time I hear that phrase used in its modern day connotation, the hairs on the back of my neck stand straight out.  Every time I hear it used in this manner, I want to grab the user by the shoulders and shake them violently while screaming; “What the f*#k is wrong with you?  Shut up does not mean really!  Learn to speak the f*#king language!”

My biggest fear is that, with our education system in its current state, our youth are not learning our language.  At least not in the way I feel it should be learned and used.  Mind you, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with our youthful use of the current slang as long as the user recognizes that it is slang and not proper English.  Except for the phrase, “Shut up!”  In my mind this phrase is still an insult.

My thesis is not without empirical proof.  One doesn’t have to do more than look at the latest postings and statuses on your friend's wall in Facebook to see what I mean.  Misspellings, syntactical errors, grammatical errors, and unintelligible dribble abound.   And it’s not just our youth.

I am constantly in awe at the poor grammar, spelling, and syntax used by people from my generation and older.  I get e-mails from managers and directors, people with Masters and other advanced degrees, which couldn’t score more than a C- in what we used to call dumbbell English.

Maybe I’m old fashioned, but I still believe that we should learn the proper use of our language and use it that way.  It is a rich language full of nouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs, synonyms, antonyms, homonyms, and many other wonderful things that make it so very interesting and fun.

I know I am not faultless in this endeavor as I am only human and thus prone to making mistakes.  However, I still feel a certain shame when I see something I wrote looking like it was written by someone for whom English is a second language.  I know many of you have seen several versions of my postings in your e-mails because when I type something on your wall or comment on your status and I spot a mistake, I delete the original message and post another.

I know English is my second language.  I just hope everyone else gets a second chance.

The Grass is Always Greener

How many times have we been stopped in traffic on the freeway with the lane next to us going 50 miles an hour?  So we change lanes only to have our new lane come to a complete halt and the lane we were in starts moving at 50 miles an hour.

How many times have we been in a slow line at the market and we moved to the line with only one person in it only to find that person has a stack of coupons and is writing a check?  And while we wait for coupon man, we see the people two carts behind us in the first line pay for their groceries and leave.

Catholics describe it as one of the seven deadly sins; Envy.  I call it impatience.  The old saying is “The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side of the Fence”.

At some point in our lives we all feel like every time we look over the fence at our neighbor’s yard his grass is greener than ours.  So we become envious of our neighbor and impatience forces us to look for a quick solution.  The obviously quick solution is to move into our neighbor’s house because his grass is already green.

So we move in, and we continue to do what we’ve always done.  We admire the lawn for the first couple of weeks.  However, we forget to check the sprinklers, we don’t bother cutting it, grubbing it, or fertilizing it.  In essence, we ignore it like we did our lawn.  Soon, our neighbor’s lawn (our old lawn) looks better than ours.

We then lose hope and become disillusioned because our new grass doesn’t look as good as it used to, but our neighbor’s grass looks great.

What we fail to see is that our “happy-go-lucky” neighbor, with his good job, nice car, and beautifully green grass, watered his grass regularly.  He spent every weekend cutting, weeding, and grubbing it.  He fertilized it once a month, and spent little time enjoying.

We spend so much time preoccupied with the grass on the other side of the fence that we fail to see the grass on our side.  We fail to see that regular watering, fertilizing, grubbing, and cutting will make our grass look just as good.  We fail to see that it’s not the location, but our actions that makes a difference in our grass.

The bottom line is that jumping over the wall without changing your ways will only result in a new dead lawn and the cycle of frustration and envy begins anew.

So, the next time you look at your neighbor’s yard with envy, ask yourself; Am I watering my grass enough?  Am I cutting, weeding, fertilizing, and grubbing my grass as much as I should?

If the answer to any of these questions is “no”, go back and take care of your lawn before you try to convince others that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.

American Extremist

Every day we see something in the papers or hear something on the news about some Muslim extremist.  In the last two months alone:

·         August 17, 2010 – Baghdad, Iraq. At least 59 people killed and more than 100 injured in a suicide attack on an army recruitment center.

·         August 31, 2010 – Kiryat Arba, West Bank. Four Israeli civilians, including a pregnant woman, were killed by Hamas militants.

·         September 1, 2010 – Lahoire, Pakistan.   Three bombings kill 25 and injure 170.

·         September 1, 2010 – Kiryat Arba, West Bank.  Nineteen people died when a suicide bomber rammed an explosives-laden truck into a police station.

·         September 3, 2010 – Quetta, Pakistan. Two suicide bombings against a Shiite's Quds Day procession and an Ahmadi mosque kill 73 people.

·         September 6, 2010 – Khyber Pakhtunkhwa, Pakistan. Nineteen people died when a suicide bomber rammed an explosives-laden truck into a police station when there were many school children present.

With all this press, one would think that only Muslims are capable of terrorist attacks.  You’d think they have a patent on terrorism.

I can see why some, with their “Holier than Thou” mentality, apathy towards current events, and general lack of caring for anyone outside their own inner circle, not to mention another nationality or faith, would see only this part of terror.  That’s because this terror is directed at us.

However, in the same two months:

·         August 3, 2010 – Derry, Northern Ireland.  A car bomb explodes outside PSNI station.  Irish extremists.

·         August 4, 2010 – Bangor, Northern Ireland.  A bomb was found under a soldier's car in Bangor. The army carried out a controlled explosion.  Irish extremists.

·         August 10, 2010 – Cookstown, Northern Ireland.  A car-bomb partially exploded under a PSNI civilian worker's car. He escaped uninjured.  Irish extremists.

·         August 12, 2010 – Bogota, Colombia.  A suspected car bomb has exploded near the studios of a major radio station in the north of the Colombian capital, Bogota.  Columbian extremists.

·         August 14, 2010 – Lurgan, Northern Ireland.  Three children are injured when a "no-warning" bomb exploded in a bin, in what the PSNI claim was an attempt to "kill police or injure police officers providing a service to this community as they responded to a neighboring area following a very vague warning that a device had been left at a local school.  Irish extremists.

·         August 17, 2010 – Vladikavkaz, North Ossetia.  Two policeman were killed and three others injured by a suicide bomber.  Chechnyan extremists.

·         September 10, 2010 – Copenhagen, Denmark. In an incident suggested to be terror-related aimed at Danish newspaper Morgenavisen Jyllands-Posten's office in Aarhus, a man of Chechnyan origin allegedly caused an explosion in the basement of a Copenhagen hotel.  Chechnyan extremists.

Many Americans don’t see this.  They don’t care that non-Americans are dying all around the world at the hands of some extremist group or another.

However, when presented with these facts, many Americans are naïve enough to believe that the problem is caused by the Muslim, or the Irish, or the Chechnyan , or the Columbian.  They are too naïve to see that the problem is the EXTREMIST and not the nationality or faith.

As a result, they become the American Extremist!

The American Extremist doesn’t care that Muslims are killing Muslims, and Palestinians are killing Jews, and Irish are killing Irish, and Columbians are killing Columbians, and Chechnyans are killing Russians.  He only sees that “Muslims extremists” are killing Americans.  Therefore, Muslims must be the enemy because they are too lazy to get past the first word.

He doesn’t see that Muslims are part of their everyday life.  He doesn’t see them working at their favorite Starbucks, restaurant, market, Mc Donald, and their own job.  He doesn’t see them at all.

The problem is not the Muslim, or the Irish, etc.  The problem is the EXTREMISTS and this idiot’s solution is to become the extremist himself.  And as any red blooded American would do, they turn to government to ban the enemy.  Don’t let them build a mosque!  Don’t let them wear their headdress!  Don’t let them be American!

What they don’t realize is that every time we give government the power to ban something we don’t like, we give government the power to ban something we do like.  If we ask government to ban a whole group because of the actions of a few of its members, we give government the power to ban something we hold dear because someone else asked.

Ban gun ownership, abortions, alcohol sales, religion, internet purchases, etc.  These are all things some group or another has asked government to ban recently.  Is that what we want?

You have my wholehearted support if you want to tell the world that you are an AMERICAN, but we don’t want to become EXTREMISTS, American or otherwise.

Fahrenheit 451

So I read about the Reverend Terry Jones of Gainsville, FL. He’s organizing a “National Burn-a-Quran Day”. Their plan is to burn copies of the Quran on September 11th.

There is so much to say on both sides of this equation that I don’t know where to start. But here it goes.

The Muslim extremists in the world are trying to spread the word all over the world that all Americans are Muslim haters. This yahoo in Florida is trying to help them convince all the anti-Americans in the world that they are right.

Without a doubt, Jones will find a following because of the severe lack of common sense running rampant in our society. By encouraging the idiot throng to burn copies of the Quran, he will undoubtedly alienate thousands of moderate Muslims and fuel the rhetoric of the extremists.

And to what end? Do he and his followers really think this is in some way productive? What possible impact can he make by burning a book when the people he’s trying to hurt are out killing thousands of innocents with car bombs and IEDs?

These extremists are people who believe that a reward awaits them in heaven for killing innocent people in suicide attacks. These are people who hold absolutely no value for human life, be it their own or others. What purpose does it serve to burn a book, when they don’t value human life?

Of course, many intelligent people are voicing their concern and are attempting to discourage this display of obviously misguided hatred in an effort to calm the masses. These include people from Obama (no surprise here) to political and religious leaders all over the world. However, while these people are mentioned in passing in our media, the larger part of most articles focuses on the idiot and his followers. Not that anyone would notice articles advocating peace, understanding, and tolerance, because those things don’t really sell papers or air time.

So what is there to gain? Well, Jones received more news coverage in a couple of months because of this stunt than he would have received in several lifetimes. I wouldn’t be surprised if he called it off at the last minute, now that he’s had his 15 minutes of fame.

In fact, Jones said in an interview with USA Today that he had not been contacted by the White House, State Department, or Pentagon. If such a call comes, he said, "That would cause us to definitely think it over. That's what we're doing now. I don't think a call from them is something we would ignore." It sounds to me that what he wants is a direct line to the White House.

So now let’s look at the other side of the equation. The side that will be offended because these idiots plan to burn copies of the Quran “which Muslims consider the word of God and should be treated with the utmost respect.” Well, Christians consider the Bible to be the word of God and as such should be treated with the utmost respect too, but I’m sure most Christians, including me, would not be going off half cocked if someone was threatening to burn Bibles.

People! While the words in it are sacred, the Quran (and the Bible) is a book. A book with millions of copies in print and which can be reproduced on a whim. If it was the only copy on stone tablets, I would be right up front with you trying to prevent this sacrilege. However, it is a book and we can go out and buy another copy.

To me this is no different than flag burners (see my note originally published on Facebook on August 17, 2010 and published here on August 28, 2010, entitled “Certain Inalienable Rights”). While I find the burning of the flag distasteful, and I believe that my flag represents my country and the lives of those that gave theirs for it, it is a piece of cloth.

The words, meaning, and symbolism of the Quran, the Bible, the flag, the US Constitution, and a number of other items live in our hearts. They have no significance whatsoever without us. It is our belief, our faith, and the inspiration we draw from these items that have value. Without us, these things are nothing more than paper, ink, and cloth.

So let these misguided zealots burn the flag (like so many America haters do overseas all the time) or burn copies of the Bible or the Quran. They will never burn our soul. As long as we draw breath, those symbols will live and no amount of fire or stupidity can change that.

What's Love Got To Do With It?

“IT'S BROTHER’S WEEK...If you have a brother who has made you laugh...” Awwww!


“Your son will hold your hand for a little while, but will hold your heart for a lifetime. It's National "Son's Week" so...” Awwww!

“IT’S SISTER’S WEEK...If you have a sister who’s been your friend...” Awwww!

Really? Have we gotten to the point in our society where we’re too busy to love one another except for one week a year? Have we become so desensitized to our loved ones that we have to be reminded that we have them and should be grateful for them? When did this happen? Is it universal?

Coming from a large Cuban family where it takes us 30 minutes to say hello and another 30 minutes to say goodbye, I think I can safely say it is not universal.

It takes us that long because we have to go around and hug every shoulder and kiss every cheek, and if someone’s in the bathroom, you wait for them.

We don’t do this so they won’t talk about us after we leave. We don’t do this because our parents insisted as children. We don’t do this because we’d hurt someone’s feelings if we missed them. We don’t do this because there’s always the possibility that it may be our last hug and kiss. Although these are all good reasons (specially the last one), we have other reasons.

We do this because we have a real sense of affection for each of them. We do it because we understand that each of them has played a part in our life and have enriched our lives in one way or another. We do it because of the eternal bond we feel through the shared adventures of our lives. We do it because we understand the fragile nature of life and how horrible we’d feel if they left this world without that last hug and kiss. WE DO IT BECAUSE WE LOVE THEM!

And with all this affection you’d think we check birth certificates at the door. In fact, the exact opposite is true. Everyone that comes to our party or our home is treated in the exact same way. You walk through those doors and you’re one of us.

And heaven forbid you’re not used to being hugged and kissed on entering or exiting a home! You will be in for the most excruciating, uncomfortable, and confusing 30 minutes of your life. It will be an excruciating experience because of your discomfort at being hugged and kissed by strangers, but it will be confusing because of the genuine affection you will feel from everyone.

A little over 20 years ago, my wife experienced this challenge for the first time. While having come from a large affectionate family, she was not used to the immediate acceptance and show of affection from everyone she just met. The same happened to my daughter-in-law when she joined our family. The nice thing is that they are both now quite used to it and would feel the same sense of abandonment I would feel if one of my relatives didn’t hug me and kiss my cheek on arrival and departure.

To us it is so simple. We genuinely care for each other and express that affection every time we communicate.

I personally end every conversation (whether in person, by phone, by e-mail, by IM, or by text) with my wife, my children, my daughter-in-law, my parents, and just about all of my other relatives with an “LY” or an “I Love you”. I don’t care if we are related by blood, marriage, or coincidence. This is how I grew up relating to those around me. I tend to hesitate a little with those that I’m not related to and therefore may not be used to it, but I feel no less of a connection to them as I do with my relatives.

So what is the difference?

The difference is that in our upbringing and in our lives we were always taught to act this way. As children we always asked; “Do I have to kiss Aunt Hairychin? Her beard tickles.” And the answer was always the same. “Yes! Hairy chin or not, she is your aunt and she loves you.” So this is the same message I conveyed to my children. Hairy chin or not, she is your aunt and one day you will understand the impact she had in your life. And we learned by example. We watched our parents go around the room hugging every shoulder and kissing every cheek, even Aunt Hairychin, and we did the same.

Why is this so difficult for some? Why are some people so totally opposed to PDAs (Public Displays of Affection)?

I don’t know why, but I hope it changes. Without these PDAs, love is sure to stay “a second hand emotion!”

LY

What's Good For the Goose...

As if to prove my point in my note (originally published on Facebook on August 17, 2010 and published here on August 28, 2010) entitled “Certain Inalienable Rights”, a number of groups are denouncing a planned rally called “Restoring Honor” to “pay tribute to America’s service personnel and other upstanding citizens who embody our nation’s founding principles” organized by Glenn Beck on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial on Saturday, August 28, 2010.

What is the reason for the opposition to the rally? It happens to be on the 47th anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King’s, “I Have a Dream” speech at the same location. Does that sound familiar for those who read my other note?

But wait! Isn’t Dr. King the one who fought for equality for ALL men, regardless of skin color, while quoting some of the same passages I quoted from our Declaration of Independence and our Constitution? Isn’t he the man that dreamt that one day “the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood”? Isn’t this the man who said that one day “all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics” will be able to join hands? He is that man!

So what is the message these protesters are sending? Here’s the message I’m hearing.

I’m hearing that Dr. King’s words were just words to them. I’m hearing that Dr. King’s memory is just a memory to them. I’m hearing that they’ve stopped dreaming Dr. King’s dream. I’m hearing that the words and the date are more important than the message conveyed by Dr. King. I’m hearing reverse discrimination.

I wonder if these same people would have complained if the rally was organized on that same date and at that same location by Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, or Chris Rock for that matter? I bet they wouldn’t have.

News flash! We have a black President and Dr. King’s own niece, Alveda King, supports the rally organized by Beck. Is it possible that Beck is just grandstanding and using the date to promote his own agenda? Of course, but that will become so obvious that it will likely have a negative effect on him and his agenda.

So get off your discriminicycle, get on the band wagon, and read that speech until you understand what Dr. King stood for (http://www.usconstitution.net/dream.html).

Dr. King’s words are not just words to me. They are like the words of our founding fathers. They are the words of a great man who wanted nothing more than was promised to us by these founding fathers. They are the words of man who, like me, believed that we are ALL entitled to “Certain Inalienable Rights” including life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Let us stop bickering about dates and places and start believing in the ideals. The ideals designed and documented by our founding fathers and believed in and supported by Dr. King. Until we can ALL do that, his dream will remain a dream and never become reality.

To borrow from Dr. King’s own words and modified to fit our situation today:

The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed OUR community must not lead us to distrust of all people, for many people have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny and their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom. We cannot walk alone!

Certain Inalienable Rights

I had a fight with my father once about our rights. The topic was flag burning. My father's stance was that our government should restrict the practice and arrest all those partaking in the practice.

Now, I am not a proponent of flag burning. I think it's a despicable practice that disrespects all those who fought under that standard over the years since the American Revolution.

However, I am a staunch defender of our First Amendment rights; Freedom of Religion, Press, and Expression. The text says; "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

I decided to see how far he was willing to go with it. I said, "What about the ones who aren't burning the flag? Should they be arrested too?" He said they should. "But aren't they just expressing their views and that's why they're demonstrating?" His voice went up as he insisted they shouldn't be allowed to speak ill of our government and desecrate the flag. "But that's the right we have under our Constitution." Now angrier, he explained how he had seen people shot for less.

Now my voice goes up in anger; "Oh! So we should have the same rights in the United States that Fidel Castro gave us in Cuba? Isn't that why you took us out of that country? So we could have the rights that he took away? So we could have the right to disagree with our government without fear of reprisal?"

Through his confusion I could see his anger rising. Not at what I was saying, but at having been caught up in his disgust to the point where he was ready to turn into a tyrant himself.

Still a little angry, I said, "As ugly as this may seem to us, it is one of the founding principles upon which our country was built. As much as I hate seeing our flag desecrated in that way, I cherish the fact that we all have the right to express our opinion without hesitation. I despise their method, but I applaud their intent."

We both eventually cooled down enough to see that we both love this country and are grateful for the rights and opportunities we have by choosing to be Americans.

That was years ago, but every day I am reminded of that conversation.

The most recent reminder is the demonstrations against the building of the so called "Super Mosque" in New York City, near the sight of the former World Trade Center (my understanding is that it is a couple of blocks away). I also heard a rumor that the planned opening is September 11.

I've heard the arguments about it being a slap in the face of all who died there at the hands of Muslim terrorists. I've heard that same anger I heard in my father's voice all those years ago. I've heard the hatred in the voices and writings of some who are vehemently opposed to it.

I think the location and date are in very poor taste. However, I stop short of asking for it to be forbidden, and here's why.

If we ask our government to forbid the building of that Mosque in that place or on that date, what's next? The next group will ask that we not open any Japanese restaurants, especially on December 7, because it's a slap in the face of those who died in Pearl Harbor. The next will ask that we not allow opening a Vietnamese restaurant, especially on January 31, out of respect for those 16,592 US soldiers who died in Vietnam in 1968 after the fighting that started with the Tet Offensive. The day would come when a group would ask not allow any Catholic churches near the former site of the Alfred P. Murrah Building in Oklahoma City, since Timothy McVeigh was raised a Catholic. The list could go on and on.

I think we need to keep in mind that while terrorists are vile, despicable, evil, thoughtless, cruel, murderous, cowards, most Muslims (as are most Christians, Jews, etc.) are kind people with different religious beliefs. Saying that all Muslims are evil by virtue of their faith is like saying that all Germans are anti-Semitic or that all Cubans are communists. After all, almost all religions have at one point or another in history been used as a reason to oppress or kill people with different beliefs. Let's not use our freedoms for the same purpose.

I think this is an opportunity for us to show the world that we mean it when we say that we are "The Land of Opportunity" and "The Land of the Free" and the "Home of the Brave". We should use this opportunity to show the world that we mean it when we say that "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness."

Our rights must apply to all of us who choose those rights, or eventually they will apply to none of us.

Let us not throw away the beliefs and ideals that we hold so dear to shut out an entire group of people because of the actions of a few, because that is exactly what they want.

The terrorists want us to lower ourselves to their standards of loathing and hatred. They want us to succumb to our fears so we can be more like them and less like us.

I think the inscription on the Statue of Liberty says it best; "Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

Let us stand united in our beliefs and our acceptance of those who want to join our cause. Let us lift our lamps beside our golden door.