Charity Begins at Home!

The origins of this phrase have been attributed to a 17^th century British author, a Jewish philanthropist, and the Bible among others.

Most interpretations of the phrase suggest that we need to take care of our own before we ask, or can expect, others to take care of them.  In other words, don’t ask others to take on the burden of our aging parents or disabled relatives before you’ve exhausted all of your own personal resources doing so.

Other interpretations suggest that we must focus our efforts on our own home, family, city, state, or country before we expend any effort helping others outside of those groups.  Yet, I am constantly astounded at how quickly people I know apply this interpretation to their favorite college or professional sports team while ignoring their own family’s needs.

Coming from a large Cuban family, I can tell you that EVERYTHING begins at home.  What we learn as children is not about charity, it’s about life.

When you think about it, if it weren’t for our parents (or those in our home), we’d still be wearing diapers, drinking from a bottle, drooling, and babbling like children.  Actually, we wouldn’t be alive at all.

From the very beginning of our lives, it is those people in our home that taught us all the things we need to know to carry on in life.  They taught us how to use the bathroom, feed ourselves, use a napkin, and speak our language.  They took care of us and taught us how to care for ourselves.

They taught us the values by which we live.  They taught us how to behave.  They taught us about honesty, loyalty, friendliness, courage, courtesy, kindness, obedience, cleanliness, reverence, and a host of other principles that guide our actions and our lives.  And, yes, they taught us about charity.

We often hear about how awful our education system is, and while it is in a serious state of disrepair, we can only blame others for a portion of the problem.  A major part of the blame for that, and many other things, has to be placed in the home.

As the son of a teacher, mediocrity was not an option.  If I did poorly in school, my parents never blamed the teacher, they punished me!  It’s not that my parents expected all teachers to be perfect; they expected me to do my part.  They knew they taught me enough of the basics to be able to apply my own intelligence to make the learning process work.

As a result of this training at home, I was always the student most likely to challenge a teacher on any subject, including other languages.  I once challenged my Wood Shop teacher (a Mexican) that “chango” was Mexican slang for monkey, and “mono” was the appropriate Spanish word.  I won that argument by simply directing him to a Spanish dictionary.

If parents today do not take care of that learning process at home, how can we expect teachers to do so?  We can’t!

It doesn’t take a village to raise a child.  It takes loving and caring parents.  It takes parents, who are ready to teach their children values.  It takes parents, who are ready to take responsibility for their children and their actions.  It takes parents, who are ready to tell their children that a teacher is not stupid, but they are if they can’t learn from a teacher’s stupidity.

This is why my children were taught to count at a young age (in multiple languages).  This is why my children learned the ABCs at a young age.  This is why my 2-year-old granddaughter can count in English, Spanish, Japanese, and French.  This is why I encourage my son and daughter-in-law (not that they needed the encouragement) to read to and teach my granddaughter.  This is why I know my children and their children will succeed.

I’m often heard saying that there is no such thing as a bad child, only bad parents.  This is because I believe that parents have the ultimate responsibility to raise their children to be intelligent and productive adults.

Charity is not the only thing that begins at home.  EVRYTHING begins a home!